Celeste
For as long as i can remember, alcohol has played a major role in problems within my family. My dad is an alcoholic. I remember at the age of 5, we went for a family outing that turned sour. my dad was driving and we rolled over. I remember standing on the opposite side of the road staring at my family trying to get out from at the back of the Ford Bakkie (those old Cortina models).
I dont even remember how I got to the other side. when the police came, he swore that he tried to sweave the car to avoid hitting a cow that was supposedly standing in the middle of the road (yeah right). fortunately no one got hurt. thing is, we have had many “encounters” with my dad’s driving for as long as i can remember, and to this day (15 JULY 2011), I do not feel safe when my dad drives. I feel that my life is on the line, and to expect anything at anytime.
Whenever i have friends over, with their cars parked in the yard (which is really huge) I still get worried that “oh man, I hope I dont get to hear a huge bang any moment, and I hope he doest come around to where we are lounging. i dont want my friends seeing what we have to put up with”.
This becomes a strain for our family because you are always on your toes, wondering if a call is gonna come through any minute to say my dad was involved in an accident, or even worse, to come identify a corpse.
Individually, this destroys all the faith you have in relationships because you get easily annoyed with someone who drinks. I swore to myself that I will NEVER get into a relationship where my significant other would constantly be drinking himself to a pulp. I have seen how damaging this is to a family, and it leaves permanent scars on the lives of children. They grow up being very disrespectful to the individual.
you and i have similar experiences. its always soothing to know that im not in this alone